Did you all miss me?

That's right! I'm back! Are you not overjoyed? Sure you are! [not] ANYWAY. Happy or not to see me.....I'm back.

I had a wonderful Christmas, with lots and lots of family! We even got to take our students with us to Grampa and Gramma's house!! They were awe struck by the house. I love that old house!! That is where Dad was brought home from the hospital when he was first born, and the house to which Mum and Dad first brought baby David and baby Carmella home over 20 years ago! {We had moved away by the time Tiff was born} Lots of memories in that house. It was built before the civil war and was owned by a very rich bachelor. There are two staircases, one for the master and his guests, that is very large and frilly. The other one is steep and dark and dank, that is for the servants and leads to the large servant quarters. These are the rooms my father and his older brothers inhabited when younger. A fact I often find very funny and can not keep myself from laughing!! The house and all it contains are history themselves! My grandmother is not one to throw anything away! She and Grampa grew up during the depression with very poor families. {Grandad is the second or third oldest of seventeen wait no, eighteen children. There was one set of twins, but one twin died making the final tally seventeen. Out of all of those, only a handful remain alive.} While I loved having the family meet once again at the old house, it did come with a bit of a sharp pain. The reason we came back to the old tradition {for as long as I can remember we have gone over there for Christmas day, but when my grandparents got to be in their 80's it became to hard on them to have everyone over at once and Gramma was nearly killing herself with work needed or not. For the past few years we have been having Christmas with our own families and one or two uncles and aunts etc getting together that day} is that Gramma is not sure Grampa will be alive next Christmas. She said since she did not know how many more holidays we all had together, she wanted to have as many of her kids and grandkids together at least one more time before he goes to see his Heavenly Father. I whole heartedly agree, that I want to spend as much time with Grampa as I can before he leaves us...But it is a rather dismal thought during the holiday to be wondering if this is the last time you will all be together like this. I can not imagine what it will do to my family when he makes his long awaited trip Home. While I would like to think that we would be comforted with the thought that life will go on, and that he is finally a place where he can see not only the sons who have gone before him and the brothers and sisters, but also the One he has been faithfully serving for over 85 years. However, Grampa is a huge cornerstone of our family. Even not getting to see him as much as I would love to, there have been many times when making a decision in my life I wonder "Is this right? Would this please the Lord? Would this please my Dad? What about Grampa? What would he think."
It is hard seeing Grampa in the health he is in right now. He is getting more and more forgetful and weak. Grampa has never been weak. This is a man who fought in World War Two in charge of a troupe of tanks, a man who bore the grief of loosing a young son before he turned five. A man who raised seven children to adulthood and then once again, had to give two of his sons back to the Lord as well as a grandson. A man who for years, even now, worked out in a two or three or larger acre garden to make ends meet. He now forgets things and cant remember the names of his kids. I understand that he can not remember my name, that he forgets I am David's daughter and thinks I am Jon's. I was even able to laugh it off when he thought I was calling him on his birthday, from Las Vegas on some vacation, instead of the break room at Meijer that I actually was. But when he forgets that he put his favorite picture of my Gramma back in his wallet, and gets rather frantic thinking he lost it, when he does things like that, when he cant get up off the couch without rocking back and forth to gain his balance. When our first hellos are: Me- "Hi Grampa! How are you?" Him-"Oh good! I have only fallen once this week! Still hurt from that bad fall three months ago though. Don't know if I am going to get over that one." That is scary. What he use to be able to say in two minutes, now takes him ten. He has to first think of what he is going to say, then begin it, then pause as he runs out of breath, then remember where in the sentence he was, then start up again, over and over.....That is hard to watch. I love my Grampa very much, I don't like seeing him that way. Dad is also very close to him. Whenever Grampa has had one of his heart attacks or a major fall or some other health issue, my father has gotten very sick. There are still a few signs that the man I remember is still there in my Grampa!! :) For Christmas this year, I gave him a frame I got while waiting at the bus station in Chicago. It says I heart Grampa. He looked at it and smiled, while holding the stuffed puppy I also got him. {since he did not have toys when he was little, he loves getting them now!} A few moments later, he took it back out of the bag and said "Who was it....{then looking at me} was it you that got me this?" I said "Yes Grampa, that was me." he then nodded with a look I was afraid was him noticing he had once again forgotten something that just happened but then said " Good....." And with a big smile "....Just makin sure I knew which one a you loved me!" THAT is my Grandad!! He is always kidding around! He is a great pastor, a wonderful father, and and excellent granpa, and he does all of it with humor!! I have told Mum before, the day Grampa does not crack a single joke and just sits there, is the day I cry and know that he is gone. Even when relating stories of the horrid war he was in, he always has a bit of humor to share and a moral to the story that is relevant even now. This was the first time I had seen him since coming home from Iowa. He sat there on the couch and said "So how was it watching all those kids?" I told him a bit about it and he replied, "Man, I wish I could have gone to do it for them." {Remember, he is 87 years old. He has had multiple MAJOR heart attacks, has a pace maker, is nearly deaf and blind......and with that said, I continue} "I would have loved to watch all them! That would have been great! I could have done it!" I said "Maybe you could have! But I don't think you would have wanted to do it for six weeks Grampa! That is a long time, with a lot of kids!" "Oh no!" He says, with a very serious tone in his voice, "I could have lasted that long. AND watched 20 kids!!" heh!! THAT is Grampa!! :)

"You make up to many voices, to many, scenario-drearyos"

Doesnt that describe me? lol. Heh. It really has nothing to do with anything today, but I like that verse in a song, and it just seems to scream me!

I am so stinkin tired! OY! My legs hurt, my back hurts, my feet hurt, and at times, my eye lids could be mistaken for brick!

Went to the doc yesterday. Really, I went to two docs yesterday. First, in the morning, I went to a LensCrafter to get my eyes checked. We thought I may need glasses for driving and other distance looking. Turns out, I have nearly 20/20 vision! So the time I used them when I was younger seems to have worked and I my eyes have healed. In the afternoon hours, I went to see Doc. Kurz for my first visit since PT. He did not do as much as I would have liked, but he did answer some of my questions so I am feeling better about that. Also, he gave me a new Rx for a lower spine corset, to help with times that I have to stand. Will have to go in and get that before I leave.

It has been three days now that I have been at work. That would be the reason I am so very very tired. They are not making me be cashier, and I am very greatful of that! They have me doing Service Runner, which is a semi new job that has been made since the changes to the store. My job is to answer the beeper calls {I am given a beeper when I come in for the day.} and those are for things like taking frozen or damaged stuff back, getting things for ppl, or cleaning up a spill. The first day back, I did go on a lane for about an hour. I told my managers I dont want to do that again! It hurt so very much! Yesterday, I was helping some new baggers.....wait they are no longer called that! They are now, 'Utility Workers', but anyway, I was showing them around, and had to watch some videos with them. The tapes were about the new system and why we have it. They showed cashiers on lanes working with the new carosels, and I noticed that almost everyone of them was bent over to do the scan and bag! It hurt just watching them! GGrrr! Other than being tired though, I do kinda like being back. Though I am more happy that it is for a short time only. Some people are happy that I am leaving!! :D Others have said they will miss me, and yet others have said they are going to chain me to the store so I cant leave!! :) {hhmm, I think I should stay away from them huh??}

Next weeks schedule was posted today, and I am working Sun-Thursday. This is a good thing, in the fact that I will then have Friday and Saturday off, before having to leave for Iowa. I had thought I would have to be there at the store till 7pm Saturday night, and be at the station by 11 the next morning for the trip! :)

Not all that much is happening right now! Heh. But that is nothing new right? I think, soon, I will start packing for the trip! Looking forward to that! I like to pack!!! The kids are going to help with that. We told them the other night, that we were leaving soon, and they cried for a very long time, very hard. It was such a horrid feeling! Made both Tiff and I cry to see Caeley leep from her chair into my arms and scream, "I dont want you to leave" and to have Sam crumple on the floor and sob!!! Katren took it much better!............At first! Dad told them at the dinner table the other night. Right after the Amen had been said for the prayer, he told them we had something we needed to talk about. Caeley acted normal at first, trying to hide a smile as she looked at me and said something about how dare we be gone for her birthday. But then she got very quiet. You know what they say....the calm before the storm. That is how I would describe that bit of silence. It was not until after dinner, when we were getting ready to go on a walk, that Kat came up to Tiff and said "My body cant take it anymore. I cant hold it in any longer" then buried her face in Tiff and cried and cried. All three of them took turns {and sometimes all at once} crying while on our walk. For the moment, they are taking it better. I know that there will not be many dry eyes in a week!!

Live a life less ordinary
Live a life extraordinary with me
Live a life less sedentary
Live a life evolutionary with me
Well, I hate to be a bother but
It’s you and there’s no other, I do believe
You can call me naïve, but
I know me very well at least
As far as I can tell and I know what I need
That night you came into my life
Well it took the bones of me,
You took the bones of me
You blew away my storm and strife
And shook the bones of me
You shook the bones of me
By the way I do know why you stayed away
I will keep tongue tied next time
Live a life less ordinary
Live a life extraordinary with me
My face had said too much
Before our hands could even touch
To greet a hello
So much for going slow
Well, a little later on that year
I told you that I loved you, dear
What do you know -
This you weren’t prepared to hear
I’m a saddened man, I’m a broken boy
I’m a toddler with a complex toy
I’m falling apart since the outburst on your heart
That night you came into my life
Well it took the bones of me,
You took the bones of me
You blew away my storm and strife
And shook the bones of me
You shook the bones of me
By the way I do know why you stayed away
I will keep tongue tied but
Honey understand
Honey understand
I was made to mend
Honey understand
Honey understand
We could walk without a plan
Honey understand, honey
Honey understand
I won’t rest in stone all alone
Honey understand
Honey understand
I’m all ready to go
But you already know
Live a life less ordinary
Live a life extraordinary with me
If I could name you in this song
Would it make you smile and sing along
This is the goal to get into your soul
If I could make you dance with joy
Could that be the second chance to coy
The very hand I would need to help you understand
That night you came into my life
Well it took the bones of me,
You took the bones of me
You blew away my storm and strife
And shook the bones of me
You shook the bones of me
By the way I do know why you stayed away
I will keep tongue tied next time

What am I thinking?

I dont know! Sounds silly maybe..but I really dont. Maybe it is cause there is so much going on in my mind, I cant isolate one thought and say that is what I am thinking.

I am happy, sad, lonely, just fine, jumpy, giddy, tired, bored.

Listening to one of my favorite artists right now....and SURPRISE...its NOT Carbon Leaf!!! Chris Thile has just released another CD. Chris is one third of one of my top five favorite bands, Nickel Creek. {that have a song that you may have heard me quote often. "I wish you out of the woods and into the picture with me" I LOVE that! lol} HHMmm...not sure I am likin this new Thile though..... I guess you should know it is not going to be the BEST thing ever when they say "Gonna try some new stuff. This is nothing like my other stuff." Grr! If it works, why change it? Chris, I'm sorry......you cant rock the mandolin......it is not the kind of instrument that should be put through that! lol!! Quit it! Stick with what you are GREAT at! Bluegrass!! And, to go a bit 'Cali girl' here, you rock with the mandolin in that!! ;) Just dont try to make rock WITH it! Well that was interesting. I think I may like alot of what is on the CD, just not all of it. Some of it.....like 'The Wrong Idea" makes my mouth drop open! Like 'Did he just say that? Can he say that? That is not a normal 'Creek' thing!!"

NC really does need to bring a new CD out! Hey! I think they should do a live CD!! Maybe? Maybe not. Well! ANYTHING would be nice. I am so impatient. "This Side" only came out when? Last year? Heh. it may have even been this year. I am not sure. But I am ready for another one already.

I think my CD list is growing way to fast! I see new CDs all the time, and they get added.....and so far I have only gotten one!! Lets see there is......

Chris Thile......Deciever

Mutual Admiration Society.......... Self Titled

Carbon Leaf..........Indian Summer

Rascal Flatts........Feels Like Today

Carbon Leaf..........Echo Echo

Carbon Leaf...........Ether Elcectified Porch Music

The Wilkinsons.........Highway

Hayley Westenra..........Pure

I'm sure there are more, I just cant think of any right now!

Dont think I will get Highway and Pure right away....the others come first. Highway has not even been released in the US anyway, so I would have to get it imported, so I think I should just wait anyway since they say it should be out here soon. Oh, and Casting Crowns is going to put out a live CD, so that should be cool and I may get that one. But then there is the chance that I could find out I dont like them live....they may pump it up even more than they do on the CD....and some of the songs are pumped up too far as it is.

Why am I in such an odd mood? Should I go to bed? I am too messed up to go to bed. Guess I will go find something to do around here......play a game or something. Its not even midnight....and now that I dont have PT :( I have not been going to bed again!

Oh! I do need to do my back excersises though! Ow!

"Hi-diddely-o, didn't ya know? You fade once you glow "

" Today I strike out on my own...." This morning, as I walked out of Troy Hospital, I heard this line sung through my headphones. It just seemed to fit with my mood! "Hi-diddely-o, didn't ya know? You fade once you glow Didn't ya know, child? After the ryhme, high time diddely-o, didn't you know? You fade once you glow. Didn't ya known, child? After the ryhme, high time." Heh, I am such a drama queen!! OY. But really, that is how I felt! I have been having so much fun the past few weeks at PT {we will call this the 'glow'} and now it is all over {this would be the 'fade'} So much rested on when I finished PT. It was another step in the direction of full recovery. It was the time that I would be allowed to return to work. It was a sign that I was to return to more normal life. And yet, as I got into my car, the end of PT meant something else. It meant the end of the nice drive three times a week, where I got to sing as loud as I wanted and think about what my day held. It was the end of silly jokes like 'Uh, did you count this one? Cause I sure didnt!' and 'Hey! You have to breathe while you do this, dont want you to pass out!' And it meant that I now had to find my own modivation to do my back work out! Like I said, I am a drama queen! :) And love every minute of it!! :P

I did go into Meijer and talk to my boss Jim. I did that Thursday. He seemed to half way expect what I had to say. After much prayer and tearful talking with both parents, I came to the conclusion that a perminante return to Meijer was not possible. Where I to go back to my old postition as cashier, and stay there for any lengthy time, I could end up doing a great deal of damage to my back, and if nothing else just keep myself in a great deal of pain! Neither of which I want to do. The plan now, is that I will work from the 26th of this month, to the 6th of next month. I need the money, and I wanted to give them the notice that was required, so as to leave in good standings. This just means that I will have to be very very careful for the ten days I am there, and make sure that I dont do any twisting. It will also mean that I am going to be SOOOO very tired, since I am going to have to totally turn my body everytime I have to put something into the stinkin bag!! OY. I am happy with the decision. While it is going to be hard to leave after three years, I know this is what is best, and what God wants. After I get home from Iowa I am going to begin putting aplications into local hotels, to see if I can work at the front desk. This would be a low impact, no lifting, sitting or standing when needed, job. It sounds perfect to me!!! :)

So there you have it. Talk to you all later! :)

Only two more days???? :(

I was told this morning, that I may only need to go to two more visits to the PT floor!!! :( Now, yes I am very glad to hear that my back is well enough now that I do not need to have further work done, and yet I am sad. I really have fun at PT and am not looking forward to it being over with. Oh well. I will get over it I am sure.

Have to go in tomorow to talk to my manager about coming back for only two weeks. I am thinking I may not even be able to come back after though, since we started using a new system, and I dont think it is going to be good for my back! They put new bag stalls in, and they are carosel bag stands. They got rid of the back part of the lane, so there is no counter space to put antyhing. You have to scan it and place it in a bag right away, and the bags are right behind the cashier, so I will be twisting all day long. I am not allowed to do that, with my back the way it is, I could pop another one. So we will see what happens with that all. Still not set in stone at all that I will go anywhere and I may just need to find another job right away. :)

It is all in God's hands!!

"Right on time, will you stay through this pouring rain?"

It has felt like one of those days...........wait no.......weeks! Pouring rain! Even though, it has been rather sunning out, specially for this time of year.

I got my car fixed today. So Mandie is now road worthy.......however, I no longer have the money to pay for gas to put her back ON the road!! :D lol Fixing her took nearly every cent I had! Things were different prices than I had thought they would be, and the work more extensive than before contemplated. Not only did that one stud need to be tourched off, but all five had to be replaced. I was told they were all very rusted and would have most likely caused certain doom sometime down the road. {They gave me the one they had to cut off........I can see how surprising it is that it held anything at all, let alone be the main sorce of problems in removal of the tire!! See, if it had not been for that ONE lug nut......my cost would have been about $50. But, since I had to have the car taken to a shop on the back of a towing truck, and then have the tire torch cut off and the studs replaced, it added another $100 to the total costs!!}

During all this, my brother has had some problems with the company that hosts his website, leading him into financial distress aswell! Then, Mum really needed a tooth taken care of, and the Doc was a bit underhanded in how he delt with things, therefor charging us for things Mum and Dad really did not want to pay for! OY!

The title to this post, is a line in a song that I love. Its called "Depression Song" and it is done by a group called Carbon Leaf {whos lyrics I have also been using as my 'closing statement'} Just seemed to fit with my mood! :)

Well, I think thats all for now....hhmm what song should I close with??

Here I'm debating time, I'm waiting
chme the wake
Free fall the cannonball volcanic
shatters on the lake
You settle down, where you runnin to?
What else can you prove?
How many, many more until you lose?
You thought a better plan could
shake this shadow land
This frozen tundra hand...
Chorus
---------
I'm turning it from shade to light
Hold it up to candlelight, roaring into firelight,
Scorching up the charlatans until it's city wide
All the people mobilize, nothing left to polarize
And nothing left to fake
Ring around the lake. Ring around the lake.
Right on time. will you stay
throught the pouring rain?
Right on time...through the night,
your laughter is my light
Right on time, desperation song
Dear I have missed your sigh
since crystal skies moved on
Peer out through Shadow's doubt
I had no passion all along
You settle down. where you running to?
What else can you prove?
Is this all a game? Was this all a ruse?
I've waited by the phone. Cold as river stone
Anxiety. Alone...
Chorus
Ring around the lake. Ring around the lake.
Right on time. will you stay
throught the pouring rain?
Right on time...through the night,
your laughter is my light
Right on time, desperation song
Right on time, desperation song

"Are you counting?"

OOOOO!! Look what I found! I had this all typed up, and thought I lost it, but just found it in the 'drafts' so now I am posting it. This is the one that I said I had and then lost!! YAY!



This is something I hear every Monday, Wednesday, and Thursday!! :D I foget that I am suppose to be counting, since I am also suppose to be doing an excersise, and breathing and holding my gut in.............I can only remember so much at 7:30 in the morning!! Heh.
So far, all I have done today is PT. And, as you all know, I love PT!! heh. So my day is going pretty good! Got up really really early, 5:45, cause I once again could not breathe through my nose! Oy! But, Mum was coming up soon to get me anyway, since she was off to the Y, so it worked out ok. Was up a lot of the night though, and that was not cool. I dont like not sleeping, and feeling like death warmed over! :/ Ah, well.
Today was the sixth time have been to PT, so it was evaluation time. Looks like things are coming along well. Some not as far as others, and not as much as the goals that had been set for me, but I am determined to meet the next ones. HHmmm, that may be hard though, since he does not tell me what those goals are!! lol.
We went to Gramma and Grampas house, and I got sick, like I already said. I am not feeling all that much better than yesterday, like I had hoped, but we shall see what happenes. Yesterday, Uncle Jon, Aunt Holly, and thier three kids came over {Erin, Nathan, and Laura} It was a very nice visit, and I think I heard Dad say we are going to be going over that way soon, so that is cool.

I have not decided what I want to do today, really. But I am thinking I need to do something. Not that I havent been doing things the past month {I dont think I wrote that Tiff and I went the the Ren Fest THREE times this year!! After going the day we had the free tickets, I really wanted to go again and was able to 'talk' Tiff into it. Though it did not take all that much! So we got to go both days of the last week of the Fest!!} ANYHOO, like I said, it is not as if I have not been doing anything, but I am thinking more along the lines of I need to do some more excersising. Kade has to work this afternoon, like every Monday, so maybe I will just go for a walk or something??? I dont think I want to wait until she is done to go, since there are many times she does not get finished till four or five in the afternoon.


Ack, maybe I will go see if she wants to walk to BlockBuster with me, this morning. There is a movie I want to see if I can find there, but I dont think it was open when I drove past it after PT.

Ok, I think that is all for now! :( I only have a few more weeks left in my PT and recovery!! I will be so sad when I have to stop PT, leave home, and start up again at Meijer!! GGGGRrrrrrr.

You talk tough to me

and it makes me smile

By the old church yard

your feelings hide

I know the reason

And you won't say:

"If we grow too close, will you push away?"

I know the reason

And I like, that we're the same

Waterfall...

Are you afraid to love? You afraid to smile?

From the inside out, to the open wide?

I know the feeling.

You're way too proud

And will they find you out if you laugh out loud?

I know, that we're the same.

Waterfall.

Umbrella in the rain

And I won't ask why.

I know the reason

I thought you should know.

I know the reason.

I'll never be the same

. I clearly see umbrella in the rain

Over you and me

You are the best thing

. Let it show

And if we grow to close,

let it undertow

This is the best thing

Should we fall down?

fall down. fall

down. fall

down fall down.

fall down.

Poor Tiff!

Today started like the other Thursdays of the past few weeks. I got up, got ready for PT, talked to Mum for awhile, then got in my car and took off down the road for the hospital. I got down right near the library, at the lights infront of all the restaurants, and had to stop for a red light. When I hit the gas to start up again, the car shook horribly and was so hard to keep in control. I could tell something was wrong with the tire {Yup, I am one great detective aint I?? JUST from that, I could tell that there was something wrong. :P } Now remember, this is still before 7 in the morning, so it is rather dark! There is no doubt in my mind that God was watching over me right then! Not only did this NOT happen on M59 a very busy busy road I have to take to get there, but also because, when I needed to get over to the side of the road ASAP, there were NO cars anywhere in my path! It was great. I was able to get into a back road to the "La Shish" that is there and being worked on, from where I saw that the tire was completely flat. After Mum got there {I was grabbing for my phone even before I was able to pull all the way into that road.} I drove the car all the way into the parking lot, and left my Mandie there, as I hopped in the van and continued down the street to my appt!
Even with all that drama.......I got there with two minutes to spare! {good thing I like to leave early and be to Troy Beaumont half an hour right? Had I left with JuSt enough time to get there, I would have been very late!} Turns out, Mike was running late as well, and was not yet finished with the patient before me, and so I got there in plenty of time! As always, had a not so 'painless' but very fun PT visit.

Then, once home, I had breakfast with Mum, the kids, and Kade before she went to the Y for her class and we took off to do Meals On Wheels. We also stopped in at Wal*Mart and looked at tire prices!

We all ate lunch together, and then again Mum, the kids, and I took off to go back to Mandie, to see if we could change the tire.We were not able to do it all ourselves, and by ourselves, I mean Mum, since I was not able to do much of ANYTHING! However, there were some very nice constuction workers, that took pitty on the poor ladies trying to get the lug nuts off, and came over to help us. One man, gave us a can of "fix-a-flat" to use instead of the bike pump we were inflating the tire up with. {It was working pretty well I must say though!} We were very greatful to him, and begain to put it in the tire right away. At first, it worked. But then, it started to spurt out the bottom of the tire! White foam everywhere! Oy! Then, in an effort to move the tire a bit, I turned the car on and move the wheel.......that is when fix a flat foam went flying, covering a good foot around the tire! This is when we realized, that the tire really was BLOWN to bits and that reinflaiting was no longer an option. The second man came over while we were working on getting the tire off. He was able to get two of the lug nuts off, that Mum had been unable to do so. The last one, however, had no cap on it. It was just the plain nut. There in lies the HUGE problem that has befallen my prized Mandie! Dad came home from work, and was good enough to come and help me aswell. {Mum had to go back to the house to get some tools that might work better, and there met Dad on his way in from work. He then drove her back in the van along with a trunk load of supplies!}
Even with everything that my wonderful Father tried, removing the lug nut was just not possible. It seems that it has become 'one' with the rim and will need to be cut off!! SO NOW! I have to have it towed to a shop tomorow morning, {a trip that will cost me $60} have them cut off the melted-stirpped-problimatic nut and replace it with a new stud so that I can put on a spare, {a prosses that is going to run about $30} and from there take Mandie to Wal*Mart to have a new tire put on {this totally another $40-$45} What does all this mean? By the end of tomorow........I will have NO money left at all, and may even owe my sister, if my accounts do not contain the needed cash.

Now, you may say to yourself after this long sad sob story, why has she titled it poor Tiff?? Because, my friends, all of this happened on my younger sisters 19th birthday! Yup! Thats right! The 'baby' of our family for 10 years, has just started the last of her teen years. And, the poor thing, was left alone for a good part of the day, due to Mandie's little temper tantrum, Meals on Wheels, and Wal*Mart! Poor thing! Today was a wonderful day, beacuse it was Tiff's birthday............but had it not been so, I think I would catagorize it under "day I wish never happened!" Oy! I have a feeling it will be the same for tomorow!! :( Oh dear!

HAPPY BIRTHDAY KADE!!!!

I may not have seemed all that

'wild' about you when you were born

;)

But I truly do not know

what I would do without you!

You are much more than my sister!

It's where I am, It's where I go,

When I need to be alone

Or find someone.

I'll sift sand and souls

And telephone poles

Stretched on this lonely

Stretch of road..

. This beach head road.

But the days gone by... For sure!

But tomorrow's back... For more!

Don't let the days go by... No more!

She is the one I hear the roar,

But i'm lost just name the shore...

Just the name the shore.

The melted chest,

Today was the day

When all i had to say

Came flooding her way.

But the days gone by.. For sure!

But tomorrow's back... For more!

Can't let the days go by

Once more!

Days gone by...

It's where I am,

So here I go.

Rehearse and first

and no Regrets to show.

What good is a speech

When at the beach?

Can't walk or talk or stand. I

guess i'll write it in the sand.

But the days gone by... For sure!

But tomorrow's back... For more!

Don't let the days go by... No more!

Days gone by...

Oh sure!

It will work now! AND show how many times I have tried to get it to work!! Grr!!

Thank you to whom ever fixed my blog!! :)

Testing

This has not been working, so I am testing it out, and if it works,............an update will be soon coming!

Testing

My blog has not been working, so I am testing to see if it is fixed!

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAa

I had an entire post all typed out, and the stupid thing had an error.............I am to lazy and upset to retype it. Maybe later!! OHGRRRR

Music, pain, travel, allergies, and more.

Well, here it is the first weekend in October, and again I have been busy!! What is it?? WOW! Before, I never seemed to have anything to do, now that I am suppose to take it easy, I am able to keep myself busy all the time! {And no I am not complaining! I am loving every minute of it!}

Two days ago, Kade and I went to Chesaning to see our cousin Missy and her three kids. We had a blast there, and I was able to handle the trip pretty well. I drove the entire way, and was only in a bit of pain when we arrived.

Then, today, we all {all eight of us!!!} went to Bancroft to see Grandpa and Grandma. That was a lot of fun! They live out in country area, and I love to visit there. Besides visiting and having lunch with them, David, Tiff, and I walked around taking pictures for a good part of the early to mid afternoon. My Grandparents still live in the same house that Dad grew up in, and that both David and I lived in when we were first born!! So it is so cool to go back there, and think about all the stuff that has happened in that house the past 45-50 years! {I will have the link for the pictures as soon as I have them up}

TOMORROW! Yes, there is more! Tomorrow, my Uncle Jon and his family will be joining our Church group. They are going to be coming here from their home in Standish, to spend the day with us. Should be fun!

I am very hooked on Carbon Leaf now, and am sure I am going to blow tons of money on their CD's once I return to work! :/ Hmmm....Maybe I should set a plan ahead of time, one CD a month? So far, I allowed myself to buy ONE cd, since on medical leave....And it was a CL live album, and I have been listening to it nearly none stop ever since! Even got Kade hooked as well!!

PT is going great!!! I really like it. Besides making me feel better, I am having fun there! I have very nice therapists, and I like the drive in and out and everything! The first week was working on stretching my legs and working on getting my 'core' strength back. Now, we are going into a bit more of working the back muscles, and that can hurt a bit, but I still like it none the less! lol

The fresh air has had a bad affect on me! I have not been able to breath right through my nose since we got home earlier this evening!! OY! Hope a shower will take care of these sniffles!

So, yeah! There you have it!! That is what I have been up to! Still lots to do! Having a blast recovering, and am no where near ready to go back to Meijer! I just got a letter in the mail from the benefits dept, telling me that I needed to give them more info as to why I was not back yet. They say that PT is not a good enough reason not to come back, since I should be able to work around it. That does not make sense to me, since they say I need a Doc note to let me get out of work, then I give them one, and they say "We don't believe your Doc that you are not well enough to come back" {The note said that I was still totally disabled in regards to work, and was not able to come back till after PT was over.} Thing that does not make sense, is that I am on Medical leave, not disability! They are not paying me a cent! Oh well!! Heh

Later!!

Should I shy down. that's boring. snoring

I'd like to teach me to

sing in perfect harmony

And I'd like to change the world.

It's easier than changing me

And I'd like to find one girl who knows me

Strum bang the drum alound or put it down and figure out if I'm out of line

Sit around and figure out if I'm wasting time

Wait for the sign.

it's time to shine shine shine

Wait for the sign.

it's time to shine shine shine

Why should I sh-shy down. how are you? fine.

Why should I sit around and be dead and never shine

It's the giant so defiant. But I'm happier if I can sleep

If I wake though. volcano.Fee Fi Fo Fum

bang the drum aloud or put it down and figure out if I'm out of line

Sit around and figure out if I'm wasting time

Lit a fire under my assets

I'd like to, I try to tread tightly, so slightly

When the forest is before us

, but we can't see for all the trees

That's when they fall, that's when I call

The good Paul Bunyun

bang the drum aloud or put it down and figure out if I'm out of line

Wait for the sign. it's time to shine shine shine

Wait for the sign. it's time to shine shine shine

We're out of line. it's time to shine shine shine

Wait for the sign.

we're gonna shine shine shine

Sept. 23rd, 2004 most productive day for me.....almost ever

Yup! For a day, I stopped being so lazy! So here are the events of my day.

6:20, Mum got me up to get ready for PT. I have to be there by 7:30 and it is only about a15 minute trip, so I don't need all that much time.

Left for PT around 6:55, and was in the waiting room at the hospital in plenty of time.
Was called back back by one of my Therapists, Mike, and PT begin. Today was the first REAL day of my PT, yesterday I went in to meet the people that would be working with me {Kristina is supervising, meaning checking in every now and then, and Mike is a PT student. This is his third year in school for this job.} and to figure out where I was as far as healing was and how we should do my PT.

After that, I was very sore even though I did not think I was going to be! All we did was some work with the muscles in my legs, like stretches and such, and the now healed cut had to be massaged to make sure it heals without a lot of bumpy scar tissue. Like I said I did not think I was going to be all that 'changed' the first day, but a few hours later!!!! OY BOY.

So, I got home around 8:30 and had breakfast with everyone. Tiff then went to class at the Y, and I headed off to get gas. The gas light had come on while I was driving home from the hospital. Also, I wanted to buy a new CD. Something I have not done since hurting my back and having to stay out of work.

Went to the Meijer gas station.....and got stuck in my car! The door would not work! Somehow, the door panel had come off the door frame and was now stuck on the bottom car frame. {does that make any sense to anyone? I didn't describe that very well. But lets just say the door was stuck and I could not get out until I slammed up against it a few times to ram the door open} From there, I went to Best Buy and bought myself "5 Alive", the live album from a group I just started listening to. Since hearing them, well and knowing who they were. Turns outr I had heard two of their songs before, and just did not know who they were. So, since hearing them and looking the band up, I have been listening to music I got off the net {through Amazon.} I got the CD, though, so I will be able to take it with me and be able to listen to it at other times then when I am only at the computer.

I am not sure what time it was when i got home, but soon after returning I left once again.This time, to go to AutoZone and get a peg to hold the door together, and to see if they could read the codes that Mandie has been throwing. They read them, and I got the peg and came home.

Fixed the door in the visitor parking spot out front of the house {stuck the peg in the door and punched it as hard as I could to get it to stick in the hole!! :D hee hee} and then weeded the garden with Kade, Mum, and the kids.


And I did all of this BEFORE 12! A time that, the past two months, has been my wake up call time!!

I was a bit tired after lunch, and did not do AlOt for a few hours. But around 3, I went on a walk and took with my CD number one from Carbon Leaf's album. I had already determined that I was going to walk the entire time music was playing from the headphones. Guess I should have checked to see how long that first CD was!! An HOUR later, I collapsed in the living room. :)

As well as all this, all day I have been doing my 'homework' given to me today at PT. To help support my back, I need to strengthen my abs. I am to walk around, sit, lay down, EVERYTHING, while sucking in my stomach and holding my shoulders as straight as I can. {this is also to help my posture.}

So see?? Rather productive huh?? :)

Boy am I tired! Mum says she has heard that three seconds of holding your tummy in, is equal to one sit up. I have done MANY sit ups today!! oy! And I got two blisters on my feet while on my walk! :(
Oh well! I had a fun day anyway!
All topped off by a nice chat with Tara. And tonight, Kade and I are suppose to go over to watch a movie with Chris.

We have decided it will be fun to go again, to the festival, since Chris' Mom has been given free tickets and offered us some. Tiff and I are going to go by ourselves on Saturday, it looks like, and we will go watch ALL the shows. :) YAY!! We will get to see the whip skit again, and all the way through this time!! YAYAY

So steadily go, the rain...

So steadily go, the time...

So steadily go, the season...

So steadily go, long ago... ..

.All the little mysteries of a big yard ..

.A little bit older, rake the lawn ..

.I am a field mouse in a tall tree ...

Dreaming past the world below

Na-na-now, we live it up lonely, but anyhow...

I'll not complain, nowadays

Na-na-Now, we live it up lonely,

high on the bow...

Mice in a maze, nowadays

"Imagination Fades With Memory"

I think I made that up (can't quite recall)

...So steadily go, the rain ...

So steadily go, the time

So in love with the notion of being in love

And all my old friends...newly married

Acquaintance now, kiss them good-bye

[Chorus]

Such a cold day for letter writing

Cup of tea, warm regards

Window paints a Herb Jones kind of weather

Wouldn't have it any other way

(at least today...)

[Chorus]

Two great Saturdays in a row?? I could get use to 'recovering'!!

I just got back from a WONDERFUL time at the Palace! Tiff and I went there tonight to watch the Rock & Roll Gymnastics Championship. This is our third or fourth time attending one of these types of shows. Before, however, we have gone to the John Hancock tour, or the TJMaxx tour of champions. This is the first time we have been to a 'competition' with this many big names. I put the word competition in quotes because, while it is a judged event, it is mostly for show.
It was AWSOME!! Just great!! I loved it! And, very much like last weekend where I screamed my head off at the Ren Fest, I do not believe I will have much of a voice tomorow! I yelled and hooted and hollared SOOOO much, and loved every minute of it!
Paul and Morgan Hamm, my two favorite male gymnasts were there, as was Shannon Miller, who has been my, well I dont like to use the word 'idol' but at the moment I can not think of anything else. Since watching her in the 1992 Olympics, I have been captivated with her and the sport of gymnastics!! She is my number one favorite gymnast of all time!
I got a poster, but the pictures that I took with my digi cam did not turn out all that well, and that kinda bums me out. But I have the memories of tonight, and the poster, and let me tell you, those both will last me for a very long time!

I am tired and need to go walk around or something. I have been sitting for quite some time, and my back is starting to hurt. Wanted to say really quick though, that my friend and I talked the other night, and she said she did not mean to hurt me that bad with not coming with me to the Ren Fest. There were other things that she did not tell me at the time, that kept her from joining us. We have now made up, and I feel much better. She was there tonight too! It was so funny. I did not see her, but I knew she was going to be there, and we tried to find each other, but were unable to.

Oy I am tired! Wonder how much more of this 'recovery' stuff I can take!

Later I will fill in the rest of tonights happenings. But now I need to go rest!


Grant, I am so happy you had a good day! You have been worrying me, and I hope this lifts your spirits, to have had a good time with friends! Have a great time of fellowship tomorow at church!!


Night all!

`me on cloud nine!!`

Stuck with me for another six weeks!! :P

Thats right. I am off work for another six weeks. My doc and I agreed that it was best to wait till after my PT is over, for my return to work. I was really hoping that he would say that! While I don't like the 'no money coming in' thing...........I can take that in exchange for being at home with everyone all the time! Mum was saying she thought I would really be wanting to go back after all this, and when Kelly called this morning {she is an old friend of Mum's, and was like a big sis or Aunt or something when I was younger. I was in her wedding when I was 5! :) She is still very dear to me!} she said she too thought she would hear me say I was looking forward to going back!

HHHmmmm, do I seem like I am unhappy? Or do I act like I dont like my family? Hope not! I am really enjoying my time spent with them!


Three years working at Meijer! Just had my anniversary date pass!! Wow! I was only 17 when I started there! Kinda wierd to think! Lots has happened while I have been there. And I have now broken the two year at one job thing I though was going to become a tradition. Although I cant remember how long I was babysitting Kyle, Cameron and Sean. I think it MAY have been longer. Maybe three years. Think I was at Lisa's with Kade longer than two.....but I cant remember! It has all been so long ago!

I hate my brain sometimes! I can remember something a friend said five years ago, but I cant remember what I said two minutes ago, or what I did five years ago {or lately, things that happened two months ago!! oy} or where I put something three hours ago!

I am a Dork! OyGrr, thats all I have to say! And ArghyLaLa

I hate the way you talk to me,

and the way you cut your hair.

I hate the way you drive my car.

I hate it when you stare.

I hate your big dumb combat boots,

and the way you read my mind.

I hate you so much it makes me sick;

it even makes me rhyme.

I hate it,

I hate the way you're always right.

I hate it when you lie.

I hate it when you make me laugh,

even worse when you make me cry.

I hate it that you're not around,

and the fact that you didn't call.

But mostly I hate the way I don't hate you.

Not even close,

not even a little bit,

not even at all.

WOW that was fun!!!

Despite the HUGE heart ache I had when I felt my friend had let me down, we went to the Ren Fest and had a WONDERFUL time! It was great!! Kade and I got up at 7 in the morning, to begin our prep. We were all ready, and I had even been on the computer for a few minutes, by the time Jen got here. She came at 10 and had two outfits with her for us to help her choose from. We had her go in the green dress, because she would then match Kade and I. We then went over and met Chris and the boys and soon after, her aunt arrived with her grand daughter. The group set off and we were all on the road by 11. The drive seemed very long, since there was a lot of construction on I-75 and it was down to one lane in many of the areas. The three cars {we had to take three since Jen had to leave for a wedding, at 3 and Chris' Aunt needed hers incase she needed to leave early.} pulled in and the eight of us all filed into the festival around 12. Just as we were beginning our walk around the shops, we were stopped by a very large parade! It was really fun! The people in it were, of course, all dressed up as different things, and were yelling out and talking to all the standers by. When we did not smile, they would tell us things such as "Better smile, you are going to be here awhile." Or "Well if you are not going to smile, neither am I!" promptly followed by a frown or scowl. That would of course make us all laugh. The parade must have lasted for like five minutes or so and then we restarted our trek. One of the first stores I saw, was named Cassie's Garlands. I took a picture of that to show to Cass!! The streets were filled with vendors if different sorts of things, like a stone that had holes in it that made noise when you blew through them. And pickles! Oh the pickles!! There has got to be like three or four pickle stands in that one fair! And the people manning those things are the loudest, but very funny. You can hear their shouts for probably blocks, were it not for the other noise that go on at these things. At one of the shops I stopped and got some VERY expensive fudge!! {Later in the day though, I was very glad to have that.My sugar dropped and I had a bad case of the shakes. Nearly fell over and would have had I not had the fudge to bring my blood sugar back up to normal! Thank you Lord for having me buy the chocolate!!}
So lets see, what did we do next? Well, we walked all over the place, and my back held up pretty well! I didn't even really need to sit down till shortly before Jen had to go.
We went and watched the joust, and that was really fun. We did not get to see the entire show, but the opening speech made by the queen was enough in itself. Being as how it was on Sept. 11th, I wondered if they were not going to have something in reverence to the anniversary, but did not know how this would be achieved in a Ren. Era manner. It was done very nicely by the Queen when, after welcoming all the those competing in the joust {keep in mind this is all scripted! It is not like people are pulled from the crowd or anything} she began a small tribute to those lost in the attacks of Sept 11th 2001. The words United States of America or even USA, were never used in this small speech, instead she simply said that she wanted to bring a new set of colours out. {the riders and teams each had a set of colours.} and went on to say that there were many killed 3 years ago. This was our nation, she said, and we need to remember them. While I can not remember the actual terms she used she mentioned that we would need to stay strong and united, and this was the way we would win in the war we now had to fight. {that was a lot of w's did you notice??} After she ended her brief statement, the American Flag was brought out and hung over the banister, while Taps were played. There were two members of the Honor guard there, one of which held the flag pole during the song. It was all very sweet and never once did she fall out of character!

We got the last half of "The zucchini Brothers"! Very funny show, very clean aswell! I was very impressed with this fact! Just goes to show you, you can be funny and exciting and NOT have to be crude. We also caught the beginning of Dead Bob. I use to really like this act, but lately he has gotten very political, and like to do a large bit of Pres. Bush bashing. So we did not stay around. Besides, this was at the time that I was having difficulty standing, due to the low blood sugar, and everyone else needed food aswell. We had not really eaten any lunch...just nibbled a few things here and there....and did not have a sit down dinner or anything either. We did get some really great chicken and chips though. They were great! There were a few other shows that we stayed to see the last portion of, or that we got the tail end of, but none really worth mentioning that I can remember. However, the BEST one IMO was....WhipBoy. And, for all of those that have dirty minds, no it was not a crude show! :) WhipBoy is a master of the Bull Whip. According to him, he is a world known whip boy and does the worlds most difficult whip trick. He also does a balloon warm up, in which he swallows a long and skinny balloon.......really! I have no idea what happens to the thing, cause he did not ever take it out...that he showed us that is. His show is a comedic danger act. I laughed SO very hard, and he was the reason I had no voice the next day! I was not sure how I was going to be able to sing at church the next morning. He had everyone yelling at the top of their lungs and screaming and laughing and hootin and hollering. Great time!! That act is definitely going to be at the TOP of my must see list for next year! {he even has a website. WhipBoy grew up just a few miles away from me!!! :O :http://www.commidiots.com/stunt.htm }

We had much fun shopping through all of the stores that are there in the festival. They have everything you can think of! Each year, Kade and I get gifts for everyone in our family. This year, we got Mum the traditional Copper Roses but we also got extra smelly oil so that she can refuel them! :) The rose smell is SOO very real, you are nearly fooled into thinking you are smelling a real rose instead of the copper one! For Dad, this year, it was the tip of a dear antler. I thought it was pretty cool! Seems he did aswell. David is always the hardest one to find a gift for at this thing {and even on OTHER non-ren days he can be a hard one} since they did not have fun 'gadgets' like he likes, back in those times. They did, however, have leather. And one shop made leather Zippo lighter holders. So we got him one of those for his prized zippo lighter. {no, my brother does not smoke, he and I are just pyros! And when you are addicted to fire, you have to have cool flame throwers. He has a really neat silver zippo...that now sits in a black leather pouch!} Sammy got a leather pouch aswell, but his is for bigger things that lighters! :) For the girls, small clay necklaces. They were really pretty and have glitter and paint on them. They are in the shape of a small swirly shell. I got Tiff a green and silver bracelet, and she got me a tiny heart shape prism pendant. It is so beautiful! The past two years, I have seen and wanted a Rams Horn. I am not ReAlLy sure why, but I thought they looked cool and have nearly gotten myself one each year, but managed to talk myself out of it before I put the money out for it. Well this year I DIDNT! I got it! Yes, ladies and gentlemen, I have my Rams Horn! It is a pretty one at that, as far as Rams Horns go. It is black and shiny and has a brown leather rope so that it can hang around my neck! Now I just have to get good at using the thing. {see it is an actual horn made out of a rams horn.} Dad can do it really well, and the sound can be heard on all three floors of our house. I just seem to get those in the room with me really upset!

We left the park at oh 7:30 maybe. I think it was rather close to 8 though. We got home at 8:30 {the trip home is always faster isn't it?} and I found that I had been burned really bad by the sun! I had not even though of sun burn! My worries were on hot and cold and making sure I did not become too much of one. It seems though, that the sun had a direct path to my neck area and the only part of me there that did not get scorched was the bit that was covered by my rather large necklace. {a purchase from a past Ren Fest visit}

Sun burn or no, though, we had an absolute WONDERFUL time, and I would get do it all again in a heart beat! Sun burn and all!! :)

When I got home, I told Mum I had one big problem with the Fest!

It was over!

Well, David has moved.

Back into the basement that is. For the past two months, since having his back surgery, David's computer has been up in his room. While that has been how he has wanted things for as long as I can remember, he said it was not as good as he had hopped. The reason for this was that, to fit his computer in there, they had to put it at the end of his bed. He had to lay in just the right way to be able to see the screen, and then that hurt his back. So he was either in pain, or not able to see very well. Plus, the computer was at the foot of his bed and the TV at the head! So he would have to switch positions depending on what he was doing. I am glad to have him back down here with us. It could get rather lonely when Tiff was at work, and I was the only one down here. Plus, since just about everything he needed was in his room {i.e. TV and computer.} there were days I did not see him, save for meal time. That was very weird sometimes. There would be days when he was gone to PT and I didnt know it because I had not seen him all day so thought he was still in his room!! The one nice thing though, to having him in his room....is that for 2 months I have not heard "BIRD! Hush up!" or "QUIET BIRD!" or "OOoh BIRD!!!" or "BIRD!!!". *Sigh* It was peacful down here. Lonely and quiet, but peacful! But I guess I can traid my peace and quiet for having my big brother back in the family!! :D

This week we are trying something new! :-O New you say? Yes, new. This Tuesday was the first day of school for the little ones. When we were little, there was no computer and no TV allowed before school time, and that started at 9am. {we got out of bed at 7, had till 8 to get ready for the day with dressing, and hair brushing, and bed making and such. Then at 8 we had breakfast. Then had till 9 to clean up and get the jitters out before sitting down for Bible class, which was always first.} I think they kids start school a bit later, but they are little and only take about an hour or at most two, to finish all thier work. So Mum was saying she was going to start the rule back up again for the three kids, of no TV and no computer. Saturday I think it was, Caeley came up and said she had seen something on TV that had really bothered her. It was a man with no clothes on, but parts that should not be seen had been covered by a black box or blurry section {like they do with peoples faces on COPS and such shows} She was asking why they had to show things like that on TV, and she said it was on a little kids channel but I am not sure if she was mistaken or not. Katren, Caeley, and Sam got to talking with Mum and they {the three kids} came up with the idea of not watching TV for awhile. Just to take a break and see if they could last and find other things to take up their time. While it was just suppse to be Mum and the kids that were on this TV Strike, I decided I was going to go along with it aswell and Tiff did the same. Dad said that he did not think it was fair to watch TV in the living room and have the kids leave the room to keep their promise, so he too went on this project as well. {David has a TV in his room like I said, so he is able to watch and not have interupt anyone or bother anyone.}We have done it before, but last night Tiff and I pulled out some games and started playing. Dad joined in, and Mum was in the kitchen with us washing the dishes. Soon, David came down and was making silly comments about our questions and answers for Trivial Pursuit. We had a blast and even stayed up past 11 all together, something that is odd on a school/work night, since Dad and Mum have to get up before 5 in the morning. I laughed so hard that my back hurt, and Mum was crying!! I mean not crying like BOOHOO, but there were tears rolling down her cheeks! It was great! Dont know what we will do, if anything tonight. The kitchen computer is having problems and is giving Dad a HUGE bad attitude while he trys to fix it!

Grant got his drivers license yesterday!!! WAHOOOO!! I am so very happy for him. Was just talking with Tara about it! :) Everyone is very proud of you! :)

Oh, I got a reply email from one of my cousins in Canada. She is my mothers oldest niece and is seven years older than me. Yesterday I wrote to her, in hopes of maybe starting an email correspondence. Maybe I will be able to get to know a bit more about that side of my family!!!

Well, my hands and back are starting to hurt, so I think it is about time to finish this up. Besides, if I have to look up a word in this pocket dictionary of mine, one more time to correct my own spelling, I think I am going to cry!

GGGGGGGGGRRRRRRRRRRRRRR!!!!!!!!!!!

I am so upset! Next week is the ren fest, something we have been planning for MONTHS. My sis and I started our planning right after the last one, in 2003, but we have been making plans with friends for the past three or four months! Tonight, I was calling around to let everyone know what time we were meeting and heading out. What do I find out? One of my friends says she 'forgot' to ask for the day off! How can you forget when we have been talking about it for forever, AND when we JUST talked about it Tuesday? That is not called forgetting, that is called not doing. If she did not want to go, thats fine. Tell me! Dont lie to me for the past few months and tell me how exciting this is going to be and how much you are looking forward to it, and then make a lame excuse last minute. To make things worse, another one of my friends that was suppose to come did not get the day off, but then NEXT day. So she is not coming either! The one and only co-worker that IS comeing, has to leave early to go to a wedding!

I am so mad right now. Mad, and hurt and upset! This is not the first time this has happened, and I am so tired of being lied to! I have no clue what the problem is. We have made plans before, and last minute she has said she cant do it......but says something that lets me know she never had any intention of doing it in the first place. We have a wonderful time when we are out together, and I love her to death, but this lying is getting on my nerves and starting to hurt my feelings! *SIGH* I left a message on her voicemail saying {grr, I said it in a 'happy laughing' way} that I think she did not ask for it off cause she did not want to go. I pray I have enough guts to tell her that again, but this time in a "I am SO hurt" tone, when she calls me back.



*cry*

It's not an old blog, and already got a face lift!!!

My Poor Blog! I have only had it for what? A month MAYBE,,,,MAYBE, and already I got tired with it! I just did not feel that the pink was very me! I am not a pink person. Not that I hate it, I got over that years ago! {I really did use to hate the color pink. Kade loved it, and so I thought I needed to hate it to be different! We are not even twins and yet we have twin problems! Like needing to have totally different likes and dislikes so as to be seen as 'two different people'. Phew! Good thing I got over that huh?? :P } I did not really like any of the blue templates, so I went with green., a much more 'me' color!! Guess I cant stick with one thing for too long. So we shall see how long this one lasts.

Right now, Len is blaming web hacking and web ads on me. Oh! He has just declared that I am 'off the hook'.............'this time'. Oy! He blames me for just about everything! Half the time I dont even know what on earth he is talking about, all this computer stuff that just about all the other guys I know GET, like Dad and David and Grant, yet I dont understand it at all and still manage to get blamed for it!! OY!! That is all I can say! OY!!

Not much happened today. Tomorow we may go to Grampa and Gramma's house. Things are not yet set in stone, since we are not sure what is going on with our Sri Lanka college students, and if Ranuka will need help moving. So there ya have it!

Ok, I think I will go do something else now. Len has stopped blaming me for the problems of this world and has left to go watch TV. There is no one else on really, well Sab is there, but not really......so no one to talk to. Could be because it is not 12:17 here. Do you think that is the reason? I dunno. Perhaps

Anyway. I am in an odd mood tonight. Wonder why!
yeah...............hhmmm

An up side and down side to seeing the Doc!!

I went to see my doc the other day, two days ago really. Have not seen him in a few weeks, and this was my first post-op visit since having the staples removed.
We got there right on time, a huge thing that in it of itself seeing as how that place is a 40 minute drive from my house! As soon as I walked in the door, I could see we were going to be there awhile. That place was packed, and it was hard even to find enough seats together for me, Mum and the kids to all sit with each other. After oh 45 minutes I would say {I am not sure since i did not have my watch on} I was called in to the office. Since it is a post-op visit they needed to take an x-ray to make sure that everything is still in its right place! {He told me when I went the firt of the three visits for my staples, that they want to make sure things have not shifted or such.) MAN was that room COLD!! And then I had to step up and lay down on this MEGA COLD metal table....ooooooooooo man! It did not take long to have 2 x-rays taken and I was told to go back to my room. Forever and a day later, Dr. Kurz came in to see me. {and I am not joking about the time either! I was sitting there so long in a once again freezing room, that my toes fell asleep, so I had to pace around the room to try and keep warm. I watched as others left thier rooms to leave, and the nurses changed the table paper and turned off the light. You see, by this time it was lunch break. I half expected them to leave me there and all go out to eat. But they didnt} What did I find out from him? The good news: I am healing. That may sound like a 'duh' statment, but I did not think my recovery was going very well. The bad news: I am not healing as fast as we would all like! The top of the cut has not yet sealed all the way, so I cant go swimming or start PT, like he was going to tell me to. I am to go back on the 14th to see if I am well enough to start the PT and in so doing, return to work. The bad news for Meijer: That is 2 days before I am suppose to return to my job!! If I have not yet begun PT, I may not have the strength to stand for 8 hours.
It is all in God's hands though. So I am ok with it all!
I am going to post this song, by Sixpence None The Richer, because it seems to keep coming up! I, personally, love it. {and you should know why, seeing as how it is scripture!! :D } If you ever have the chance to hear it, take it. It is called 'Trust" and the music and singing that goes with it, is just so pretty. So here we go. Here is my song of the week!
`Till next we meet`


Trust
Trust in the Lord with all your heart
Lean not on your own understanding
In all of your ways acknowledge Him
And He will make your paths straight
Don't worry about about tomorrow
He's got it under control

Just trust in the Lord with all of your heart
And He will carry you through
Lord, sometimes it gets so tough
To keep my eyes on You
When things are going rough
But then I turn my eyes up to the sky
And I hear Your voice it says to me
You have much trouble in this world
I have overcome

Oh! I feel like throwing up!

I went to go get some purple thread at Wal*Mart, for my Ren. Fest costume Mum is making me, and I did a really stupid thing. To get into the store parking lot, from the way I was going, you have to make a left hand turn. Only thing is, while there is a turn lane there is no light for the turn lane. You have to go on green, when there is no on coming traffic in your way. No one had been able to go, since traffic was very heavy at this time, during the green light but all of the sudden, the two cars ahead of me went. Me, following the 'crowd' went along with them. Turns out, we were going on our red, and the green for traffic out of the store {does this make sense? There is a light for the outbound traffic from the store, but not inbound traffic for the store?} It was not until I was right under the light, and saw the light, and the cars to my left started to honk at me, that I realized I was doing an illigal turn. So now I feel like puking! I hate it when I do something like that, I didnt really mean to at all. I just did not want the ppl behind me mad because I was not moving, and I did not pay near enough attention. I am shaking. And that must have happened oh at least a half an hour ago. But then again, there was also the fact that I was in pain while driving, so that must have something to do with my shakes. My seat still has to be back a bit while I drive {or even ride.} My back is not well enough to drive normally. grr and oy!
So that is the 'fun' of the day. I have come to the conclusion that this entire ordeal, of both David and I suffering from back problems and undergoing surgery, has made me even more emotional that I use to be. I cry at even more than I use to. It is really worrying me for my return to work. An event I have nightmares about almost every night. No way do I feel ready to go back yet, and I can not seem to convince myself to remember that it is still a month before I have to return. It is just that, before all this, I was able to handle so much stress and junk. Now, so much makes me cry and break down and I am just thinking I am becoming weak! Phisically I know I am now. That is to be expected I guess, though I still do not like it. I am feeling all around weak, and like it not the least bit!Oy, Im a mess! And all this from a tiny cut in my back! What does this mean for childbirth?? I shudder to think. Mum, I thought you were kidding when you said they were going to have to put me out for it, I am begining to think you are not so far off! heh. Guess I have alot of growing up to do between now and then!!??
Ok, I think my little pitty party is over for now!

Congrats Grant!

Hey everyone!
Grant got his website done and released it. It looks really great! Congrats! One funny thing about this, to me, is that you know how the first post I put on here was about how I got this blog so I could post on his blog? Yeah, well he made his own, a really nice one, too! But NOW, you dont have to have an account with any blog site to post a reply on his post....and he is not going to use the other one as much! lol. Kinda funny huh? Oh well!

I am going insane today! Not sure why. Maybe it is because it is all gloomy and rainy out today, and has been the past few days. While adding text to a pic of Tiff and I together, I was trying to remember the first year that we went to camp. See, the night we came home from the first year of camp, we watched Masterminds, on TV. I 'fell in love' with the main character 'Ozzie Paxton' played by Vincent Kartheiser. {Dont worry, I have since seen the error of my ways....and cringe!} About a month later, we got CB radio/walkie talkies and needed code names. I took the name Ozzie, and begged Tiff to take the name K-Dog, which was the name of Ozzies best friend in the movie. Since then, Ozzie and K-Dog have become part of 'who we are'. We no longer think of it as the names from that movie. For part of Kade's {one of the many variations on the original K-Dog name I have given my younger sister} graduation gift, I gave her a little German Sheppard stuffed puppy with a bracelet I was using as a collar along with a dog tag that had her real name, nick name, and the year we 'became' K-Dog and Ozzie. Phew! All that to tell you why I think I am going insane today! Oy! Well, if you are reading this, you most likely already know me and know I do this type of thing all the time. ANYWHOO. I digress. While making this picture I wanted, like I said, to put down the date we had given each other those names. On her puppy gift, the dog tag says 97, the year we have for long said was out first year there. Turns out, we have been wrong all this time! OY OY OY OY. I went all over the house trying to find my camp books with the year on it to see why we thought it was 97 when it was really 98! Ohgrr


Lets see,.....what else? OH, I added a few new albums of pictures to my yahoo pictures! I have to go soon to my page and link a few more things there, like my old photo albums and Grants new page.
Later!

Sams Birthday

Today is Sam's 5th birthday. His day is going great!! He is loving every minute of it, just like a little five year old should!
My night was pretty horrid. I didnt go to bed till 1 or 1:30, not a bad thing most of the time, but last night {I guess that is this morning isnt it?} I could not stay asleep. In no time at all, it was 3:30 and I was awake! I think I rested until 4, but by that time my back hurt alot and I could not find a position where it didnt. Then I was hot then cold hot then cold. I had enough after not too long, and just gave in to the fact that I was not going to be able to get back to sleep, and wrote letters and read my Bible for a few hours.
So I have been up since about 3:30-4am! It has not had much of an affect on me, until now. Maybe that is why I am not feeling well! I have an upset stomach, but it does not feel like something I ate or anything.
Tara and Grant called me this afternoon, and we talked for oh I would say an hour or more!! Would have been longer had it not been for the fact that I guess I did not power up my cell last night. :/ So it died! Thanks guys, for calling!! That was so great!! It was great to finally get to talk to you {with voice} for so long without a computer going down! {nope, no computers, just a phone going down!} And, as Tara put it, I got to 'meet' the guy behind the "Hobbit Adventure"!!! :D hee hee!! Sorry I did not get to talk longer! I will call you guys again soon though!!

Well, I think I am going to go to my room for awhile. I am really not feeling well.
Lata all!
`Till next we meet`

All this so I can say Hi to Grant! lol

Where is the logic in this? I have a website that Mum is about the only one that visits and a message board to boot, also with the same visitor list, and yet I get a new blog page? HHmmm, is there something wrong with me?
The reason behind this? Yes there is one. I wanted to post a reply to a blog one of my good friends has, and you cant do that without having an account. So I thought, Ok I will get a user name and then go post on Grants blog....but no! Now that I have a user name, I have a Blog page myself! Something else for me to worry about needing to update for no reason! lol!!
Oh well, it is another way for me to talk to myself, always a good thing right? Long as I dont do it out loud and in public, I can get as many other systems as needed, and the world will be alright!

So I hope now I can at least think of something witty and funny to say on Grant's blog, or this will all be for naught!